giving it all to the paper
I am not a god. I was manipulative as a kid. I had traits of sociopathy, traits of ADHD. Traits of whatever the fuckness. so many people have tried to make me feel shit for not gaming the system. With my looks, with manipulation, with sycophancy. Humans like power. But there is something I learnt from throwing away a seemingly perfect relationship because of my romanticization with it. I am finally going to stop trying, to take from life. I'm going to stop feeling wronged. Whatever life gave me, a household with domestic violence and (self-minimized) slight physical abuse. Loneliness, rejection, I have transmuted it. And for that I am proud. I fucked up Kimaya, I really did. I threw it away and ruined it. And whatever the fuck people are going to say doesn't really matter. I've heard you out, I've apologised until I couldn't anymore, I've been slapped viciously as a nice reminder of my childhood, I've felt your righteous anger, I've seen the posts you m...